So, just like Bradley Cooper getting photographed was not Dave’s (Mr. Eggers-neither one feels right) favorite thing. So I made it clear to him and his assistant that my goal was to make this a good experience for my client, for them and for me. And I worked with what worked for them as well as telling them my needs. It turns out that he had had been sick for two weeks and the day I shot him was his first day out of bed. He had something like this horrible flu that’s going around but felt more like Mono. Boy did I feel horrible. I can imagine that it’s much enjoyable to be photographed for an international magazine on the first day you feel good enough to stand. But he was very accommodating and super nice. I wish I could of stayed for an interview. Working for newspapers I often get to, and that is maybe my second favorite thing about my job. But this time I did not. I got to go to workshop he teaches for high school students where they publish a book at the end of the year. The magazine chose a photo from that but I’m not gonna post that here.  Wow what an intelligent motivated group of young people.

On a side note when we were leaving Dave handed the journalist I was working with a book that McSweeney’s published. It turned out my photo was on the cover. Two amazing women I know, Zoe West and Maggie Lemere did a book for the Voice of Witness series McSweeney publishes. It was on Burma. Burma had been my passion for quite a while. So photo I took while in Burma ended up on the cover. That was kind of cool.

I’m only going to publish two photos for right now. My life is taken a quite busy turn. Shooting all the time. Which I’m thrilled about but leaves me less time for this blog. When I find some more time I’ll add a few more photos.

I also have been shooting on Polaroid/ impossible film but I’m without a scanner temporarily, so hope to post those soon as well.  Pictured are Alexzandria Jade, Jessica Hewlett, Brandon Long (A photographer theonlymagicleftisart), and my daughter Aliece.

Although, this shoot looks simple getting it done was actually quite complecated.  Something I realized that I thrive on, chaos, intensity, complexity. It was such an honor to shoot him hope I get to again in the future.

I have experienced and witnessed such acts of kindness since I left San Francisco. The man that sat next to me on the airplane paid for my ride into Manhattan for no reason. I went to a 24 hour Rite Aid near me at one in the morning. The woman working there was chatting with a homeless woman,  with tremendous kindness and compassion. I think she would have spoken with her all night if the woman had stayed. The girl working there couldn’t have been more than 23 and the woman who came in must’ve been 65. I saw someone give their umbrella in the snow to an older man who didn’t have one. And he list could continue.  I’m wondering if this extra kindness was due to the devastation of Sandy. When tragedies happen in a collective way we all tend to pitch in to help each other to think about the other person we don’t know. Which lead me to think about all the quiet personal tragedies people go through everyday. The ones that are not posed on the news but that we all soldier though in private. I wanted to remember to be kind to everyone. I’m a New Yoker. Transalon a complainer. Sandy reminded me that a grumpy person I met in a store could’ve just lost his wife to cancer. Someone who bangs into me on the street and curses, could have just lost their job. I am a New Yorker and I do complain and get grumpy but I hope I can take these lessons away and the others will too so that it doesn’t take a tragedy like this to bring us together and kind.

My brothers friend Alen Hirsch who wrote an op-ed piece for the New York Times recently about drawings he made during the blackout writes more eloquently than I ever could. He talks about making drawings of his daughter, who at 13 is usually on Facebook. She let him because there was ” nothing better to do” . Of this he wrote “Losing this power, however, also reminded my daughter and me of what we have left. Having “nothing better to do” can be a meaningful and sobering experience. While the darkness made us feel our vulnerabilities, it also illuminated the possibilities that we forgot were always within it.”

Now the photos. A few of my brother trying to box with Alan and a few of Times Square election night. I went more to experience than to photograph. Took only 50 shots if that. I loved being there. People from all over the world gather.  Foreigners, unfortunately, seem to understand better than most Americans the impact of US  president has on the entire world. It was spectacular to  witness an Obama win with new friends I had made from around the globe. The shots so different from my usual work reminded me of how I got into photography. A university student with  my friends Gigi Cohen,  Michael Ackerman,  Teru Kuwayama.   They are some of the most talented and committed photographers out there. I was a dancer at the time taking some photography classes and super interested in the medium (I could kick myself). But I’m now inspired to get back to my beginnings black-and-white and blurry. If you look closely too you will find Cookie Monster lurking in one of the photos.

Let me explain. Eight years ago, I was at the Republican National Convention in New York. At the time, I worked as a nanny, raising my daughters part-time as a single mom. It was an important election to me. I felt strongly that I did not want Bush to be reelected and just as strongly that I wanted to be a photojournalist. So, I went with my Nikon manual focus camera and my 24 lens.  It was eight years ago. I didn’t understand exposure; I just let the needle sit at the middle (for those of you who know what that is).  A lot of amazing things happened there. Not everything had to do with photos. But I did see James Nachtwey working and I followed him around like a kid running after the Ice Cream man. Then, I photographed Moises Saman getting arrested.  Newsday wanted the photos, not really knowing how terrible they were. I was still shooting film and they hadn’t used film in years, so they had to warm up the machine. In the meantime, I got to go out to dinner with the Newsday staff. Very exciting. This led to my first freelance gig when Jeff, Newsday’s director of photography called me over two years later. He thought I’d received an internship at the paper. I hadn’t. But it ended up being a regular freelance gig.

I also got arrested, the first indication that I didn’t have the best instincts in high drama situations. My tendency was to freak out. I rushed into a crowd being arrested by the police and was hauled away with the protesters. As I looked across the street, I saw veteran photographers snapping away. I tried to act tough, but ended up crying. I called Newsday, I called my friend David, who worked for Getty. I spent 24 hours in jail with people who yelled nonstop about the “police state.” I screamed back, “No, it’s not.”

Nothing is so simple. This is where journalism gets tough for me. I was against Bush, along with those arrested. I admired their passion, but didn’t think that yelling at the police for 24 hours was helpful to the cause. I also sympathized with the police. Many were just doing their job, got caught up in the moment. I had no idea who they supported for president. I was angry with the Bush administration, not the police.

Word of my arrest spread and fellow photographers were supportive. I met lot’s new people. New and old friends, David, James, Angela and GiGi helped me figure out this photo thing for years to come. Thank you. I’m grateful. I even met Alan, who rented me a room in his apartment, what he called the Heartbreak Hotel. The amount stories from that place is unending.

Alan didn’t think I could make it as a photographer. He later apologized when he realized he was wrong.  I remember hearing him and Yughi argue about my future as a shooter. Yughi supported me as I sat in my room.

Four years ago, I was at the  Democratic National Convention. I went on my own and ended up shooting for the New York Times.  I also met Susie, and now she is trying to be a photographer. I think she was encouraged. I next shot the primaries for the Times in New York and met one of my closest friends, Mashid.

What’s funny and significant about all of this is that I get so easily frustrated and feel like I should be so much further along than I am. Six years ago, I began working as a photographer. I remember meeting people working for the New York Times and thinking that was as good as it got. Now, I take it for granted.

Three years ago, I lived and worked in Asia. I went to Africa, Mexico, the Middle East, Europe and Southeast Asia. I’ve met amazing people. I stayed with Iraqi refugees in Jordan, met with Islamic militants in the West Bank, went to home generally forbidden to foreigners in Burma. I lived with the most amazing woman in east Jerusalem, have been welcomed into so many peoples’ home and made deep friendships. And I have enough great stories that could fill a book, the one on the bus being perhaps the funniest (ask Angela).

It was in Bangkok were I reevaluated what I was doing. I realized photojournalism wasn’t exactly right for me. I’m so passionate about human rights and realized how much I love taking portraits, doing work that’s perhaps more ethereal–and not journalism.  I brought back my art background.

Now, the attention that I once focused on the worries of the world, I now give that  to each person I shoot. Just being present with them. God, I’m cheesy. That’s me.

Still, I always want be way ahead of where I am today.  And I always talk to my daughters about not doing that. It’s not a very spiritual way to be. But right now, here’s a little appreciation for where am and where I came from. And encouragement for anyone starting out. I’m still starting out really. Maybe we always are.

Michelle said in her speech. And “we were taught to value everyone’s contribution and treat everyone with respect.” and that the belief that hard work and effort matter and if you perceiver you will succeed. So my encouragement to others this is: This is the truth and the the key to success in my opinion in photography.

I still shoot reportage sometimes. So, here are a few jobs for Le Monde’s magazine. One was about Peter Teal’s foundation, which has been in the press a lot lately. And here’s another about McCloud, California. Thanks so much for reading. Would love to hear your thoughts. Email or tweet me.

I am sad to say that I learned nothing from all her great packing tips. You should read the article. They are amazing, I’m not kidding! I envy her. But I’m afraid it is just not in the cards for me. I has a shoot out of town the next week, and besides my camera gear which I’m hyper vigilant about, the rest of my packing leaves a lot to be desired. Here are some of her tips. http://runway.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/07/13/packing-tips-from-the-land-of-the-compact/

On this shoot we faced so many challenges. It seemed everything was going wrong. I’ve never had that happen before. It started on our way to the shoot. There had been a shooting (of the other kind) on the Bay Bridge. Which led to one lane out of 5 being open during rush hour. This made us 2 hours late. It was hard to be too stressed, yet, as I was glad to have not been on the bridge when the shooting took place. And kind of put things in perspective. Then when we got there there was almost nowhere to set up my backdrop, then multiple equipment failures and so on. Luckily, I inherited from my mom the tenancy to over prepare for everything. And I do. Which is probably a pain for those helping me, but it is just so ingrained in my being. And boy was I glad for it on this shoot. Lots and lots of back ups.

But I also realized in this kind of situation I kind of thrive. I have several learning disabilities, including dyslexia (which is not a surprise to anyone who’s ever received an e-mail from me). These were not discovered until I was an adult. So growing up as a kid I had to kind of do things the wrong way.  In math class I was often told that I did the problem wrong but got the right answer. So when things aren’t going right, the right way, it seems kind of natural for me to keep going and find a way to make it happen. Plus I’m stubborn as a mule. I also had help this time from my new absolutely amazing assistant Amy Harrity, who I assume you will see shooting herself very soon.

Some more photos from the Times.  http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/2012/07/15/travel/15SILICON6.html

I was too busy to think much though. Had 16 meetings with new editors and publications. Got to meet some really great people. Also got the hang out with some editors that I adore and have been working with a long time, and some that I’ve been working with but never met. Babysat my 6 month old niece. She is amazing!! Went to two weddings. Worked a bit. Saw my parents and brother (though not enough of them.) Hung with some friends( not enough of them either.) Got caught in a few rainstorms. Got to go running on my old running path along the FDR and East River, love!! (and eat Baby Cakes afterward). I’ll be back to New York in October. Honestly, wish I was there now with the heat wave. I know it drives most people crazy but I adore it, and miss it so.

I also spent some time in LA which i’m liking more and more (minus the driving part). Finalized putting my team together there. I’m going to be spending a lot more time in LA very soon; equal to the time I spent in San Francisco. Basing myself half there. And my daughters just tuned 13. Wow busy times.

On another note. I was shooting a lot before I left, creative portraits (my love), here are some tear sheets and outtakes from some other shoots. Lots of exciting things happening on the horizon. Stay tuned.